


How to ruin a date with your best friend

by Melime



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Coming Out, First Kiss, Getting Together, M/M, Trans Male Character, trans rodney
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-29
Updated: 2015-10-29
Packaged: 2018-04-28 18:37:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,227
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5101448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Melime/pseuds/Melime
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John says something inconsiderate and ends up ruining their date before he can even tell Rodney it's a date. So he needs to apologize and make it up to him, but emergencies in Atlantis keep getting in the way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	How to ruin a date with your best friend

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Português brasileiro available: [Como arruinar um encontro com seu melhor amigo](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5101451) by [Melime GreenLeaf (Melime)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Melime/pseuds/Melime%20GreenLeaf)



> Wow this is by far my longest one-shot ever (and third longest overall), and I'm kinda proud of it. At first, it was supposed to be a simple gen around the idea John calling Rodney "Meredith" without knowing he's ftm (the name is not the only reason reason why I headcanon his as trans, but it does offer something interesting to work with), but then things started happening and it turned into McShep (my first, and first SGA too) and him being trans ended up being just one aspect of the story, instead of the central point (dammit John, I was trying to make it gen, why did you keep hitting on him?). There's potentially triggering content here, so I put that in the end notes, if you may have a problem with accidental coming out or misgendering, among other things, you should check there for more detailed information (or not read this, of course). I'm not sure about my gender at all, but I'm fairly sure I don't fit the binary, so I'm not ftm, and am of course more than willing to listen to any criticism from people who are, or just other trans people where their experience applies (I did my research and tried to be respectful, but I know the learning never ends). Just so you won't read 11K words then get disappointed, there's no smut, just heavy making out and interrupted sex (three times, the poor guys), because one day I'll learn to write smut, but today is not the day. Also, this is my 100th fic posted here (err, 100th original, but double that for crossposting in pt-br, and I do translations too), so I wanted to do something special, and that's how I ended up with something so long (that and, I couldn't stop writing, I almost came back to the beginning and added three more scenes, but I didn't want to ruin it and I thought it was cool).

They were watching a movie, and John should have expected this result when inviting Rodney to watch sci-fi. They actually managed to make through the first half of the movie with only mild complaining, but now the story had progressed to very noisy space battles and other things Rodney was more than happy to point out that were impossible. It was the seventh time he had pretty much yelled at the TV over the liberal use of ‘reverse the polarity’ to explain away things that wouldn’t make sense even if they weren’t just saying gibberish when John started to lose his patience. He liked hearing Rodney complain, sometimes liked it a bit too much, but it was more fun when it wasn’t all about a single subject, or at least when John could complain about Rodney’s complaining.

“You know, most people just sit back and enjoy the movie. You don’t see me complaining about guns that seem to hold infinite ammo or nearly impossible shots being taken by people who are firing a weapon for the first time,” John pointed out, hoping to change the direction of the rant a bit. He took advantage of Rodney’s distraction and yawned, stretching his arms and then placing one behind Rodney on the couch.

“Oh, don’t even start. You complained plenty about inaccurate rescue operations. And look, that’s the eighth time they are using ‘reverse the polarity’! The ship was cut in half and is venting atmosphere, what exactly do they think ‘reversing the polarity’ will do? You can’t ‘reverse the polarity’ of a massive hole and expect it to disappear!”

John had to concede that it was pretty ridiculous, but then again, no one watched this kind of movie for their scientific accuracy. Although it was also not the type of movie for what John had in mind, but neither he nor Rodney liked romantic movies, and scary movies would probably have a too strong effect on Rodney, so John settled for a movie he would accept to watch with him.

“Next time we are watching a period drama, let’s see how you feel about that, doctor my medieval city has flying machines and is steam powered.”

Rodney rolled his eyes. “For the last time, I was following the rules as to speed of technological development. It’s not my fault if some people think that making no technological advancements is the proper way to run a society.”

“There’s advancements and there’s running a steam punk medieval city. And don’t even think I didn’t notice you were trying to get them to extract fossil fuels. I was half-expecting to see a car there if Weir hadn’t stopped us from playing.”

“The game wouldn’t let me do it, anyway.” Rodney frowned. “Did you see that? They almost flew into a sun, were exposed to deadly amounts of radiation, but supposedly everything is ok because their scientist, who is constantly referred to as just scientist without any indication of her field, managed to ‘reverse the polarity’ of the solar radiation? Even you have to see that this doesn’t make any sense.”

John was almost confident that he had managed to stir the subject away from any polarity, but that would have been hoping too much. So he tried the one thing that almost never failed to irritate Rodney, hoping to at least break this infinite loop. “Shut up, Meredith.”

Rodney tensed next to him, and not so subtly tried to move further away from him as much as was possible without getting out of the small couch. This should have been some sort of a warning sign, but since Rodney always reacted badly to the use of that name, John didn’t think much of it, although he was hoping for a more heated reaction. John took back his arm, allowing Rodney to have his space. After that, they both remained quiet for the remainder of the movie, and it was just when the credits started rolling that John noticed how much he missed the complains. He was certainly spending too much time with Rodney, or at least not spending time enough doing the right kind of activity, if he enjoyed the complaining so much.

“Had I known this was the way to keep you quiet, I would have used it sooner. May actually have been able to follow the plot that way.” John was pushing his luck, but he wanted to get Rodney to complain again, having him quiet was strangely disturbing.

“As if this movie had a plot worth following. It could have been retitled ‘Shouting Reverse the Polarity in a Vacuumless Space’,” he said bitterly, even more so than his previous remarks.

John guessed he was still mad, and began tossing at him the unpopped corns that were all that remained of his jumbo-sized popcorn bag. “Come on, don’t tell me now you’ll get all pissy over me calling you Meredith. We were just starting to have fun.”

“I’m not pissy, and I’ve told you I don’t like this name.”

“You are pissy, you always get pissy when people call you Meredith.”

“Don’t call me that! How many times do I have to tell you that?”

“It’s just a joke; you don’t have to react like this.”

“A joke on my expense.” Rodney was getting angrier, and ready to walk away. He felt somewhat betrayed, that what promised to be a quiet evening enjoying a bad movie had turned into this, and it almost made him wish he had never reconnected with his sister.

“Hey, if anything, you should be mad at your parents. What were they thinking when they named you that?”

“That they had a daughter,” Rodney said before he could stop himself, and was mortified when he realized what he had revealed. He couldn’t believe he had just said that, and didn’t want to have to deal with the fallout that would surely come when John understood his words, so he ran away from the room.

For a moment, John stood there, frozen in shock. Finally, he was able to process the meaning of those words, and tried to convince himself that he had misheard. If Rodney meant what John thought he meant, he had screwed up big time, and Rodney was in his rights to be mad. But that couldn’t be it, could it? He had reviewed everyone’s files when he found himself as ranking military officer, and couldn’t remember any mention of this in Rodney’s. John needed to apologize, but needed to be sure what he was apologizing for beforehand, so he set up to investigate this. Maybe Rodney never meant for him to know, but it was too late for this already.

\---

Rodney felt betrayed, by John as much as by himself. He told himself he wasn’t going to cry, so he didn’t. He had managed to survive worse situations than that. This was salvageable, he just needed to find a way to fix things and make sure John didn’t tell anyone. Not that he feared he would be taken from Atlantis because of this, the stargate program always had a history of being very acceptant of useful people and he was sure he made himself indispensable enough, but people could still make his life rather unpleasant and Atlantis was a small community. It was just his luck that the first time in years he accidentally outed himself was in front of a good friend and the person who would be in the second best position to make his life hell if he wanted to. That he happened to have a little crush on said person that maybe wasn’t so little was just adding insult to injury.

At the moment, his strategy was hide in one of the less used labs. It was secluded enough that no one would bother him unless they put serious effort into finding him or were willing to call him in his radio, and he didn’t want to be in his own quarters on the off chance John wanted to talk to him. If he was lucky enough, maybe he could avoid talking altogether, which would be nice. Not talking about it was his favorite way of dealing with things in general.

He threw himself at his work, and decided not to think about what had just happened. Despite his talent to solve problems, his preferred method was to ignore things and hope everything would work out all right, and just worry about it when it was clear that the problem wasn’t going to solve itself. It was the way he was able to make Atlantis run, ignoring things until they were a problem or were on the way of becoming one, not that he would let anyone outside of his science team know that. Therefore, he would argue that ignoring things was a legitimate strategy and not simply hiding.

\---

His first plan was to ask Carson.

As far as plans went, it was a pretty bad one. John already suspected he wouldn’t tell him a thing, but he wasn’t expecting the lecture he got about not meddling in other people’s lives. If Carson knew anything, and John suspected he would, if there was anything to know, he wasn’t going to tell him anything.

His next step was to check personnel files again, despite knowing he wouldn’t learn anything. Rodney’s file didn’t even list the name Meredith, it was under Dr. McKay, Rodney. It was the only one listed by last name then middle name, and that was the only clue he got. For the first time, he wondered if Rodney’s name was still Meredith or if he had changed it, if his sister was talking about something that was no longer true.

He could drop the subject entirely, but he still needed to apologize. He would even concede that using that name was cruel regardless of the reasons Rodney had not to like it, although maybe a more specific apology was in order. He wanted to provoke Rodney, because he both loved and was annoyed by Rodney’s constant complaining, but he didn’t mean to hurt him, and regretted crossing that line.

When he finally planned what he wanted to say, it was too late to go after Rodney. This would have to wait. He hoped Rodney didn’t think he was avoiding him. John thought about the irony of the situation, ask a guy out for dinner and movie (as much as one could invite someone to dinner while not having access to a restaurant or even a kitchen) and end up insulting him into leaving before getting a chance of making his advancements known. At this rate, he was more likely to make Rodney stop speaking to him than kissing him. Once he was aware of his feelings, the first rule he made for himself was that he wouldn’t let Rodney get hurt, and the second was that this wasn’t going to affect their friendship. And now he broke those two over something he had casually done before, just never thought was harmful.

\---

Three days passed before they saw each other again, and then it was to leave for a mission, so they couldn’t talk. Rodney was very good at hiding when he needed, and truthfully, he had work to do all around Atlantis. That he would normally send someone else instead of walking from one place to another fixing things wasn’t too much of a tell that he didn’t want to be found. Or at least it was something he could find a way to explain away if needed, and he could always say he wasn’t really hiding because he had his radio.

During the mission, they managed to be perfectly professional, even though their normal banter wasn’t there, something that Ronon and Teyla found strange, but mentioned nothing about.

It wasn’t that John was trying to ignore the problem, he just didn’t want to make things worse by rushing this talk as if it was something that just came to his mind and could be quickly dismissed, and he knew Rodney would appreciate some privacy for this. He owned Rodney a proper apology and he would give him that.

\---

A week later, Rodney thought he was safe, and came back to his quarters early. Or at least early for him, although it was past ten. He was tired after having spent the entire previous night working on a frivolous project that didn’t even warranted that much attention, and was eager to call it a day. He had time to take a shower and get dressed, and he was contemplating if it was too early to go to bed when he heard John calling him at the door.

John had known where Rodney was all the time he was trying to hide, of course. The good thing about being able to use the equipment of a city that had sensors all around was that he could use his powers for evil. Although normally he wouldn’t mind finding Rodney in whatever hiding place he was in, this time he wanted the conversation to happen somewhere where they wouldn’t be interrupted, and work couldn’t be used as an excuse, so he was waiting for the sensors to tell him Rodney was back in his room. Unfortunately, it took this long for Rodney to actually go to his room at a decent hour.

Rodney was _not_ happy to see him. If fact, he begrudgingly stood in the doorway, with that look usually reserved for people who threw citrus at him. “What do you want?”

“May I come in?”

Rodney narrowed his eyes, and repeated his question.

John supposed he deserved this kind of treatment, but that didn’t mean he would give up. “I was a jerk and wanted to apologize.”

“Fine. Apology accepted, go away,” Rodney said trying to close the door.

John placed his foot in the way, not forcing the passage; just enough to activate the security measures that prevented the doors from closing on people, figuring Rodney wouldn’t go so far as to overwrite that. “If this was all I wanted to say I wouldn’t have waited until I could get you alone with some time to spare. Please, can we talk?”

Rodney rolled his eyes and moved away, not looking at John. “Make it quick.”

Now that he was there, he was unsure as to what to say. Everything he had planned seemed somehow inadequate. He decided respecting Rodney’s previous wishes was the most important thing, so he would start with that. “I won’t call you that anymore.”

“Good, I only had to ask you about a million times. Now if only everyone else stopped mocking me too.”

“I could ask them…”

Rodney looked at him angrily. “Don’t you dare!”

John raised his hands in a sign of surrendering. “I wasn’t going to tell them! I was just suggesting I could tell them not to use it anymore, if I made it an order, or said Weir doesn’t want this kind of teasing anymore…”

“Do you really think I haven’t considered all of this? Carson offered to do the same thing when he heard my sister had told you my first name. But this isn’t the first time I’ve been in this sort of situation, and believe me when I tell you it’s better not to say anything. I didn’t even plan to tell you, but… never mind,” he stopped short of making another unwanted confession, although he himself wasn’t sure as to what he wanted to say.

John archived that reaction, but didn’t think it was the proper moment to push for an explanation. “I wish you had chosen to tell me. That you knew you can trust me.”

Rodney rubbed his eyes, pausing for a moment. “It’s not a matter of trust; I just don’t feel the need to tell people this. Honestly, it isn’t anyone else’s business. At most I’ll tell people I have a good chance of having a serious relationship with, and that’s about it.”

John looked somewhat embarrassed. “I just thought you and me…” He made a noncommittal gesture.

Rodney raised an eyebrow. “I don’t mean serious relationships with my friends, I mean people I’m sleeping with, or at least planning to.”

John refrained from commenting this was exactly what he had meant, since this didn’t seem an appropriate moment to hit on him. Instead, he returned to his previous point of making an apology. “Right. Look, I really am sorry, if I had known, I would never…”

“Oh so the reason why I’m hurt is more important than the fact that I’m hurt?”

John winced. “No, that’s not what I’m saying.”

“Are you sure? Because this is what it sounds like. What difference does it make if I hate that name because my parents made a poor decision or because they thought they were making a good choice but it still caused me grief? Either way I was mocked for being a guy with a girl’s name, and I don’t like that this is starting again. Why should anything else matter? I told you I didn’t like it, and that should have been enough.”

Rodney made a good point that John hadn’t considered before. This wasn’t going how he planned at all. Specially, the last words stung, Rodney was right, as his friend, that should have been enough.

“This wasn’t…”

“What you meant? You obviously meant to misgender me, that’s the only way that mocking me over that name makes sense. Or will you try to tell me what you were saying wasn’t ‘silly McKay with a girl’s name’?”

John sighed. “You are right. That was the joke, even if I haven’t thought of it in these terms. But I didn’t know how much this would hurt you, and for that I’m sorry.”

Rodney raised an eyebrow. “So you are saying that now you know how much you were hurting me? Because I very much doubt this. You can’t know, because I haven’t told you, all you can do is assume, the same way you were assuming what you were doing before was harmless.”

John was at a disadvantage. Rodney had had conversations similar to this many times before, and was tired of every single argument John could throw at him, while John was unsure as to what to say.

He wanted to ask Rodney to tell him how hurt he was, but figured this would only make him angrier, so he did the one thing Rodney wasn’t expecting, he stopped trying to defend himself. “Fine, I was being an asshole, and I thought it was funny and harmless but it wasn’t, and that’s no excuse. I’m sorry. I wanted to provoke you, maybe tease you a bit, but I didn’t take your feelings in consideration and ended up hurting you, so my intentions aren’t important. I apologize for what I did and won’t do that again. Please tell me if there’s anything else I can do.” He never thought he would put what little he learnt in couple’s therapy to a good use, but if Rodney’s expression was any indicator, he had finally said something right.

Rodney had to admit that this was a fairly good apology, and was better than what he expected of John. John made a habit of surprising him, although not always in pleasant ways, and Rodney liked that more than he cared to admit. Rodney sighed. “Alright. I see you actually put some effort into this. So, let me see, don’t tell anyone, pretend you don’t know, and stop walking around eggs.”

John smiled slightly. “I can do that. So, are we good?”

Rodney shrugged. “I guess.”

Then John remembered a thought that had crossed his mind during the week he had to think about it. “Can I ask you just one question?”

Rodney sighed, rolling his eyes and preparing for whatever invasive question John had. The faster he was done with this, the faster they could go back to normal. “If you insist.” He just hoped it wasn’t something that would make him never be able to look John in the eyes again.

“Well, your sister, she doesn’t call you Rodney. Why do you let her do this?”

Rodney blinked, confused. Trust John to ask him something he never heard before. “You are actually the first person to ask me that, although I’m sure my parents always wanted to know. I never let them do it, not after I was safely away from home. To be honest, I’m not sure I have an answer. She was the first person I confided in, and she was young enough that she probably can’t even remember thinking of me as anything other than her brother. Back then I haven’t even started to think about a new name, so I guess I got used to it. I never liked that name, mind you, always complained it was a girl’s name even before I knew why that bothered me. It’s just that, I don’t know. She doesn’t say it as a girl’s name, she says it as her brother’s name, and that makes a difference somehow. I don’t know if this makes any sense, but it just feels different. Although I would rather she didn’t use it near other people, but that’s a concept she has trouble understanding.” Rodney was actually impressed with his ability to verbalize this, as he had never giving it much thought before.

“I guess I can understand it somehow. I’m not saying it the same thing, it obviously isn’t, but it always bothered me how Michael used to say that I was dressing up as a woman when I wanted to wear panties.”

John was still trying to figure where exactly he was going with that when Rodney interrupted him.

“Wait a minute, Michael the Wraith? Why the hell would you tell a Wraith you wanted to wear panties? I know we were trying to make him believe we knew him and he was our friend, but that’s no reason to share this type of information.”

John frowned. “What? No, of course I’m not talking about the Wraith. I had a boyfriend in college called Michael. A bit of a jerk, now that I come to think of it.”

“You named a Wraith after an ex-boyfriend?”

John shrugged. “Seemed to fit. I don’t know, we needed a name, he reminded me of Michael. And you have to admit he looks like a Michael.”

“Oh please don’t tell me you have been naming all Wraith after ex-boyfriends!”

“Just after the bad ones. This has the advantage of making the names easy for me to remember, and I’ll be more on my toes when interacting with them.”

“One would assume that them being Wraith would be enough to do that. And what will you do when you run out of exes?”

“I think it’s more likely we run out of Wraith to name.”

Rodney rolled his eyes. “That’s so typical. I should have assumed you would have a mile long list of ex-boyfriends as well as ex-girlfriends.”

“Come on, let’s not make this such a big deal. I just like naming things, it’s fun.”

“Oh but when I want to name things after people I’ve dated you mock me.”

John smiled. At least now Rodney was complaining in his usual way, the way that was nice and familiar and told John everything was ok. Plus, Rodney didn’t seem affected by his bisexuality or his accidental confession about panties, so maybe things weren’t so bad after all. He let his guard down, and spoke without thinking. “You know, this really wasn’t the result I had in mind when I asked you out, but as far as dates go, I’ve had worse, how about you?”

“I’m sorry?” Rodney asked, looking at him as if he had just asked if reversing the polarity could recharge a ZPM.

John figured there was no going back, so he might as well come clean. “Our second date. I kinda ruined the end but up to that point we were having fun, right? What do you think, worth trying for a third one?”

Rodney looked at John with suspicion. “Right. Uhm, how about we go see Dr. Beckett?”

John laughed. “There’s nothing wrong with me, Rodney, and I’m the same me you know.”

“I’ll have to stop you here, because the Sheppard I know never went out in any dates with me.”

John scratched the back of his head. Maybe not informing Rodney that he was asking him out when that was exactly what he was doing wasn’t exactly the best course of action. “The picnic the night of the meteor shower and then dinner and a movie last week. As I said, two dates.”

Rodney narrowed his eyes. He remembered when John invited him to watch the meteor shower on one of the towers, and although it was true that he seemed more nervous than usual when suggesting this, at the time Rodney had thought nothing of it. Still, they did things together so often he had no reason to think about those two particular events as anything special. “What do you mean dinner and a movie? We eat together all the time and watched dozens of movies!”

“Yes, but I specifically asked if you wanted to go out to dinner and then watch a movie, that’s universally recognized as a date.”

“No, restaurants and cinemas are a date. Food in the cafeteria and a movie in the entertainment room is a weekly activity.”

John rolled his eyes. “I had adapt; it’s not as if Atlantis was made for dating. But we shared a table just the two of us, and then went to watch the movie with the room just for ourselves. As I said, date.”

“Right, and you were asking me on a date because…?”

“The usual reasons people ask other people on dates.”

Rodney wasn’t entirely sure that he hadn’t just been transported to an alternate universe or was inside some sort of simulation, because the whole situation seemed too bizarre to believe. “You have got to be kidding me.”

“I’ll admit that wasn’t one of my brightest moments. I figured if things progressed nicely, we would eventually end up kissing and that would be a strong enough clue. Of course in my plan the kissing part came before the embarrassing admission about occasionally liking to wear panties, I normally save that for after a couple months of dating. Luckily, I still have other embarrassing things to confess later.”

“Right, that’s it. Suspension of disbelief lost. I don’t believe you. This is some sort of elaborate hoax or something.”

John crossed his arms. This wasn’t going according to plan at all. “It’s not an elaborate hoax, I promise you, but I don’t know what I can offer you other than my word.”

Rodney narrowed his eyes. “Prove it.”

That caught John by surprise, and he needed time to think, so he pretended he hadn’t understood. “I didn’t really bring any panties with me, on account of the military going through everything we brought, but if you want to we can try to find someone where who wouldn’t mind giving me one.”

Rodney waved his hand exasperatedly. “What? No, not that. The dating part.”

John still lacked a proper answer, he imagined that Rodney would either welcome his advances or react really badly, he never thought he would have to deal with him questioning his intentions. “How the hell am I supposed to prove that I was asking you out? I mean, I could ask you out again. Dinner, tomorrow night?”

“No, that’s too easy. That’s not proof, it’s just you saying it again. I need hard evidence.”

John raised an eyebrow, but refrained from making a joke. “Apart from us actually going on a date, which we already did, twice, what do you have in mind as proof?” he was serious, he had no idea as to how to prove to Rodney that they had went out. If someone had told him that talking about Rodney’s gender wouldn’t be the stranger part of the evening, he wouldn’t have believed.

Rodney thought about it for several seconds. He also wasn’t sure what exactly he was looking for. He just knew that he couldn’t believe that John Sheppard had just asked him out, three times, apparently. Rodney snapped his fingers quickly, having an idea. “You mentioned kissing,” Rodney said, uncharacteristically unsure.

John uncrossed his arms and placed his hands in his pockets, unsure as to where this was going. “Right. I did.”

“Right, then. A kiss. Yes, that would be great. Enough evidence, I mean.”

John tried not to sound too surprised. “You want to kiss me?”

“No!” Rodney almost yelled, waving his hands in front of his body.

John frowned, and repressed his disappointment. “Oh, ok. So, what do you want?”

Rodney licked his lips. “I don’t mean that I don’t want to kiss you, I don’t not want to kiss you, I’m just not saying I do want to kiss you. What I mean is, you are the one who has something to prove. So I’m not saying I want to kiss you, but I won’t believe you if you don’t kiss me.”

John thought about pointing out that this logic was extremely flawed, but then he realized that Rodney hadn’t rejected him. He was ready to have to deal with the anger of someone who knew how to reprogram most things in the city, but Rodney didn’t seem angry at all. Since he wasn’t being tossed out of the room yet, John decided to push his luck. “Is that a challenge, McKay?”

Rodney had the decency of blushing. “Of course not! A challenge is normally made when one wants a certain outcome, or wants someone to make a fool of themselves. I’m a scientist here, just collecting data, completely indifferent, you can provide me with evidence or not, and based on that I’ll formulate my hypothesis.”

John took a couple steps, standing in Rodney’s personal space, with a few inches between them. Enough to be intimate, but not to crowd him too much. He didn’t want to assume, but couldn’t help but think that, if Rodney was as indifferent as he was claiming to be, he would have told John he wasn’t interested and that would be it. He placed a hand on Rodney’s cheek. “I’m going to kiss you now.”

Rodney held his breath, and refused to close his eyes until John’s lips were on his. It was a chaste kiss, but persistent, not a simple brush of lips. John tried to show with it how fond he was of Rodney, in a way he couldn’t quite describe in words. It was a confession, and one that came unexpected to him. He had expected their first kiss to be urgent and lustful, something that could be explained as happening in the heat of the moment, not something so delicate and intimate. When they parted, John caressed Rodney’s lower lip with his thumb, feeling his breath against his skin.

Rodney blinked once, twice. “That doesn’t prove anything!” he complained.

John raised his eyebrow, confused. “Excuse me?” He couldn’t help but feeling a little disappointed that Rodney didn’t seem to feel the same connection.

“That doesn’t count as a kiss. You were far away from me and had your lips closed, so it doesn’t count. You said you had asked me out, so if you want me to believe you, you have to give me a proper kiss,” he said, as if it was the most logical thing in the world.

John growled. Trust Rodney to make an argument out of kissing. Still, John decided to take this as a good sign. Either that, or Rodney was trying to set him up as revenge, and he could be an asshole, but he wasn’t that kind of asshole. He almost regretted wishing that Rodney would go back to complaining. It was testing his patience in a way he didn’t want to admit he liked being tested. “Fine. You want a proper kiss, I’ll give you a proper kiss.”

“I didn’t say I want–”

Rodney didn’t have time to finish before John pulled his head back by the hair, and when he yelped, John pressed his tongue into him, exploring hungrily. With his other hand, he grabbed Rodney’s ass, and then lowered his hand to pull his thigh up, making Rodney reflectively place his leg around his waist. With Rodney secure in place, John placed his hand at his ass, easily lifting him up and swinging with him. He let go of his hair to toss away everything that was on the table, and Rodney tried to push away and complain about his computer, but John refused to release his mouth, instead dropping him on the table carelessly, pinning him in place with his upper body.

John began to rock his rips against Rodney’s, and in response, Rodney enlaced him with his other leg, pressing against his body. Rodney had long forgotten that he was pretending to be indifferent and was kissing John with all he had. Both of his hands were entangled in John’s hair, and when John tried to pull away for air, Rodney hesitated to let him go, although his own lungs were burning. He finally relented, and John rested his head on the table, breathing heavily next to Rodney’s neck.

After a long moment, they looked at each other, both flustered. An uncomfortable silence fell between them.

“So… you believe me now?” John asked with a smug grin.

Rodney grabbed him by the front of his jacket, and replied nearly growling at John’s lips. “This better be real, and not some twisted game of gay chicken.”

John kissed Rodney again, then bit his lower lip and grounded his erection against him. “Do I seem like I’m joking?”

Rodney remembered something, and was impressed by his own brain’s lack of timing. “Wait, this means you are bi, right? Because Jeannie bet me one hundred dollars you were. And really, you are one to talk about trust, because you never mentioned this to me before.”

“I’m not sure what amazes me the most, that you are thinking about this now, or that you made this bet in the first place. But yes, if the ex-boyfriends weren’t indication enough. You owe her. I can’t believe you betted I was straight. And I haven’t said anything because I couldn’t think of a way to do it that wouldn’t seem like I was hitting on you.”

Rodney laughed. “No, I thought you were so far in the closet you had reached Narnia, Jeannie bet that I could make you admit it. And you should have hit on me sooner.”

“There’s a difference between in the closet and in the military, not that I mind much, at this point I think it’s a given my reputation will never be very good.”

“You can save the Pegasus galaxy how many times you want, as far as the IOA is concerned, they would rather have their own man here. But don’t worry, I’ll refrain from telling her via e-mail.”

“You know, I think your sister may have been trying to set us up, because she told me you were bi. Worse, she pulled me aside and said I was your type, and not to tell you she talked to me, but that your previous boyfriends always commended your blow job skills,” he said, suddenly changing the topic back, not wanting to talk about the IOA.

Rodney rolled his eyes. “That’s typical of her. First she says you are out of league, then she tries to set us up. Now can we please stop talking about my sister? It’s seriously killing the mood and I would rather go back to kissing.” To make his point, he grabbed John by the neck and pulled him down.

John didn’t allow the kiss to go far this time, pulling back to ask, “You didn’t answer me yet.”

“If you keep insisting on talking instead of making out, I’ll not be held accountable for my actions. And what the hell are you talking about?”

“Are we on for dinner tomorrow night? I promise this time I’ll call it a date.”

“Forget dinner,” Rodney said, pushing John’s jacket down his arms and tossing it away. “Our next date can be breakfast.” Then he paused, averting his eyes, suddenly timid when he continued, “Too forward?”

John smiled and didn’t answer, instead lifting Rodney’s shirt and kissing his chest, stopping to tease a nipple on his way down. Rodney tried not to whimper without success. His hands found that mess that was John’s hair, and he pulled slightly. He couldn’t remember how many times he had thought about just entangling his fingers in that hair like this. Feeling a sudden urge, he pulled John by the hair to kiss him, and without thinking tried to invert their positions.

“Dammit, McKay,” John said rubbing his head, having reverted to the surname as a reflex. Rodney had inavertedly dropped both of them from over the table, landing painfully on top of John, and with his hands and legs trapped under them. He didn’t even seem to notice something had happened, kissing away John’s complains and wiggling his ass over John’s hard cock.

Being the focus of Rodney’s full attention was an exquisite pleasure. When his hands began to wander, finding their way under his clothes, John felt as a magnificent Ancient device whose secrets Rodney was trying to uncover. Rodney had just released John’s hard cock from his pants when he stopped his advances and sat up on John’s lap, with one hand still on his cock.

“McKay,” Rodney said, audibly annoyed.

John forced himself to open his eyes, and tried to focus. He almost wished he didn’t. Rodney was sitting on his lap, absentmindedly palming his cock with his left hand while the right was on his radio, and he had that expression that meant one of his scientists was about to be obliterated. It was hard to concentrate when Rodney was jerking him slow and irregularly, occasionally rubbing his thumb slightly against the head, but John was nothing if not persistent and if they were calling Rodney at this hour, it was probably important.

“Zelenka, remind me to write a book called _Atlantis for Dummies_ , it will be just six hundred pages of ‘ _don’t turn on a device if you don’t know what it does_ ’ written in size seventy two,” Rodney sighed. “I don’t suppose Weir would allow us to let all scientists that are too dumb to function here die by their own stupidity, would she?”

John huffed, and that turned into a moan when Rodney twisted his wrist just so. Rodney was gave him a warning look to be quiet, although the radios weren’t meant to capture environmental sounds.

Rodney frowned at something Zelenka said. “What? When has my brain ever gotten me into trouble?” He waited for a response, and then mostly ignored it. “Alright, I’ll be there soon enough. Did you call Beckett? Right, then tell him to test the orange ears. McKay out.”

John raised an eyebrow. “Orange ears? Anything I should be worried about?”

Rodney ignored him, instead jerking his hand a couple more times and looking longingly at his cock. “Such a shame, I was hoping I would get to suck your cock while I finger you, have you come in my mouth, then make you taste it all the time I was fucking you, and by the time I was done with you, you wouldn’t even remember your name.”

John moaned his name, and jerked his rips forward. He was so close, if Rodney just held him a little tighter…

Rodney sighed. “Unfortunately, one of the new scientists assigned here decided to turn on a device that made his skin purple and now orange ears are growing and falling out of most of his body. I have to go see if I can find out what he did.”

That was a bucket of freezing water, bringing him back from the brinks of orgasm. John made a disgusted face, and noticed his erection flagging in Rodney’s hand.

Rodney frowned. “Sorry, maybe I should have waited to tell you that. I assume a quick hand job is out of the question now.”

“Yeah, colorful detaching extra body parts are a real mood killer. Is he in any danger?”

“Not right now, according to Beckett.”

“Good,” John replied with a nod, because the safety of his people always ranked as his top priority, even though the science team wasn’t technically part of his people.

“So, what happens now?” he asked unsurely.

John shrugged. “I guess we could meet for dinner. Or I could wait you here, if that thing you said earlier was a promise.”

Rodney bit his lip, and looked a bit surprised. “I wasn’t sure if you would be into that. Bottoming, that is.”

John shrugged again. “I’m flexible. As long as you don’t want to fist me or something like that, my ass is yours. I actually broke up with Bob because he kept insisting on the fisting thing.”

Rodney shook his head. “Please stop with the ex-boyfriends before I can never look at a Wraith seriously again.”

“That’s kinda the point, you know, they aren’t so scary if you look at one of them and think of an obnoxious frat boy.”

“Fine, it’s a promise then,” he said, purposefully ignoring that part of the conversation. “But if I have to suffer, you have to suffer too.” He placed his index finger on the middle of John’s chest. “You have to _wait_ for me. No touching yourself in the meantime.”

John had to think about it for a second, because just thinking staying in Rodney’s room, waiting for him, was reawakening his arousal. “You drive a hard bargain. But fine. Now go save the poor scientist before we drown in orange ears.”

Rodney got up, and extended a hand to John, that John held for a second too long after he was already standing. They looked at each other for a long moment, neither quite knowing what do say before Rodney had to run to the lab.

“Can I kiss you?” Rodney asked. “I mean, like a ‘see you soon’ kiss.”

It might seem a strange request, after all the kisses they shared in the previous moments, but John understood it. Foreplay kisses and greeting kisses were very different things, meant very different things. John nodded, and closed the space between them.

This time, the kiss was slow and deliberate, lacking the previous violence and impatience, but not the fire. Somehow, it seemed almost too intimate, and John couldn’t help but think that this would be how the perfect first kiss would feel like. They parted hesitantly, and Rodney gestured to the door.

“I have to go now, or Zelenka will start radioing for me again.”

John smiled. “I understand, duty calls. I’ll be here waiting.” It was only after Rodney was out the door that he realized that maybe his words had some hidden meaning, at least to himself. Maybe something about secret work not needing to be secret, and that leading to a kind of understanding that his previous relationships lacked, but he repressed these thoughts, wasn’t ready to deal with that yet. Instead, he went to Rodney’s bed and laid with his head down on a pillow, allowing Rodney’s odor to fill him. His erection was returning, and he realized how much of a torture would be having to wait, and hopped that Rodney finished everything quickly.

\---

Rodney didn’t finish everything quickly. The mess was bigger than Zelenka had described and by the time he got there, several of the so-called scientists were growing colorful extra appendages. The machine, that as far as Rodney could tell was made to provide researchers with tissue samples or maybe allow transplants, needed a complete recalibration, and several components had to be replaced before he could get it to stop the cellular replication. It was mid-morning by the time he managed to save the day yet again, and he was exhausted. He figured by now John would have left his room, and he would have lost his chance. Surely by now the military commander of Atlantis must have regained his senses and realized that he didn’t want to date him.

Rodney got in his room, and tried not to feel disappointed when he saw that John wasn’t there. He couldn’t possibly think that anyone would wait that long for him, and John had his duties to Atlantis. He briefly wondered if it was worth the trouble going back to the mess hall to get something to eat, but decided that he would rather just go to sleep, and tried to convince himself that this had nothing to do with the fact he was really looking forward to seeing John.

He was sitting on the bed, taking out his shoes, when the door opened without his command.

“Hey, I hope you don’t mind, I wasn’t sure if you were awake,” John said, walking in holding a paper bag.

“How did you do that?” Rodney asked, although he had seen doors open at John’s command even when they shouldn’t.

John shrugged. “Most doors here open if I think hard enough about that. I try not to do this too much, just when they are locked or I have my hands full.”

Rodney cursed the unfairness of John’s supercharged ATA gene. “You know, I need my computer and about fifteen seconds to do that.”

John smiled. “Don’t get jealous, I’m sure Atlantis loves you too.”

They were silent for a moment, awkwardly facing each other. Then, both started at the same time.

“So…”

“I…”

They stopped. Rodney gestured to John, and said, “You first.”

John nodded. “I passed by the lab, Zelenka said I just missed you. He said you haven’t eaten, so I got you breakfast,” he said lifting the bag. “No coffee, though. I was specifically warned not to let you have any more coffee.”

Rodney rolled his eyes, and gestured John to give him the bag. “That’s typical, I yell at a couple incompetents and suddenly I’m overly stressed.”

John tossed the bag to him. “Normally, I would agree with Zelenka, but from what I was told, this time your actions may be warranted.”

Rodney wanted to complain that his actions were always warranted, but John brought him donuts, and he was too tired to come up with a proper comeback, so instead he just said, “They were. These people would destroy Atlantis if I wasn’t here to save it.”

John laughed. “Yes, you are the only person here who can save the city, no one else ever does it.” Then, in a more serious tone, “Sorry I couldn’t wait until you got back. I was here all night, but had to leave when it was time for my shift. You must be tired, after working all night like that,” he said, with a question behind that last statement.

Rodney cleared his throat, and tried not to think of John spending the night on his bed. “I’m good, not the first time I had to undo the work of idiots.” He hesitated, averting his eyes. “I’m sorry I kept you waiting.”

John smiled fondly. “It’s alright. We all have our duties here.” He bit his lip. “If you are tired, I can leave.”

Rodney blushed once he realized what John was saying. “No, not too tired, not tired at all,” Rodney lied. “What do you have in mind?”

John took a couple steps forward. “I could barely sleep tonight. Kept thinking of you, of all we could do once you got back.” He gave two tentative steps forward, and bit his lip, fighting off his incertitude. “I was hard the whole night, all I wanted to do was burry my head in your pillow and jerk off until I came all over your sheets.”

Rodney choked on his donut, and decided to toss the rest in his nightstand. At the moment, John was much more interesting than breakfast.

John kneeled in front of Rodney, and whispered against his ear. “But I was such a good boy, I waited for you, just like I said I would.” He bit Rodney’s earlobe. “Now, will you keep your promise?”

Rodney grabbed him by the hair and kissed him, hard, pulling John’s body over his and onto the bed. All the need and desire he had repressed while working came rushing back, occupying his mind entirely. John didn’t waste time teasing him, too far gone to even hope to make this last, and immediately started taking Rodney’s jacket, while kicking off his shoes.

They awkwardly tried to move themselves to the middle of the bed without breaking the kiss. Rodney settled his head on a pillow while John kissed his neck, and it was almost too much. He closed his eyes, relaxing under John’s touch.

John noticed Rodney’s breathing calming, and pushed himself away to comment on it, but then he noticed Rodney wasn’t complaining about it, so he called his name softly. Rodney opened his eyes, visibly startled.

“Oh, no. That did not just happen,” Rodney said, once he realized he had just dozed off.

John smiled, and placed a hand on his cheek. “It’s ok, you are tired. You should probably get some sleep.” If this had happened under different circumstances, it may have hurt his ego, but as it was, he just assumed it was a result of Rodney working himself too hard. He knew Rodney could sleep under extraordinary circumstances when he was tired enough, including against this lunch tray or with just his forehead against his desk.

Rodney interrupted that train of thought. “I can do this. I’ll be more alert once we get going.” He didn’t want to stop, didn’t want to risk missing the opportunity for the second time, especially because now he didn’t have the excuse of urgent work.

“When was the last time you slept?”

Rodney had to think about it. “Wednesday, I think? Or maybe Tuesday. Definitely sometime this week. I think after our last mission.”

John dropped to his side, pushing him slightly so they could lay side by side in bed. “Then it’s settled. You sleep now, and tonight I’ll bring you dinner. We can eat here, that will be romantic. A proper date.”

Rodney reached out to him. “I… I don’t want you to go. Please, I’m awake now, that won’t happen again. Maybe you could fuck me this time, nice and slow. I promise I won’t fall asleep.” He sounded uncharacteristically insecure, and it hurt John just to think of why he could be like this.

John kissed the top of his head, and adjusted their bodies so they were cuddling, with Rodney as the little spoon. “As tempting as this offer may be, and believe me, it is very tempting, I prefer my bed partners to be fully awake at all times during sex. That being said, I can’t stay here too long, or they’ll come looking for me.”

“I understand,” Rodney said, failing to hide his disappointment.

John didn’t want to make Rodney feel like this, so he completed, “But, I said I was taking a break before I came here, so I think can stay until you fall asleep.”

Since he was too exhausted to complain, Rodney nodded. “We are doing this all backwards.”

“Hm?”

“We had our first fight before I realized you loved me, you asked me out after we went on two dates, we almost had sex before we went on a proper date, and now we are sleeping together before we had sex,” he said with a slurred voice, already starting to doze off.

John laughed against his neck, because he haven’t thought about it this way, but Rodney was right. Then Rodney tensed against him.

“I’m such an idiot, you haven’t said anything about love and I just had to go and ruin everything, I can’t believe I just–” Rodney said nervously.

“Shhh,” John whispered against his skin, kissing his neck gently. “I love you, Rodney, it’s ok.”

Rodney relaxed with his touch. “That’s… that’s good. Because I… hm… I love you too. So, it’s good. Otherwise it would be awkward.”

John couldn’t help but smile. “And now we said ‘I love you’ before we managed to go on a proper date. What’s the next thing we can do out of order?” he asked between neck kisses.

“If you keep kissing me like this, you are going to make me come before you get me out of my clothes.” Rodney’s tone of voice was still relaxed, but he moaned softly because of the touch.

John stopped, laughing. “We can’t have that. Go to sleep, Rodney.”

Rodney didn’t reply, instead trying to fight the exhaustion, just to keep feeling John so close to his body, breathing against him. However, it was hard not to relax, and after too many days without sleep, it too him mere minutes to fall asleep.

\---

When Rodney woke up, he was alone, and for a moment he was sad, before remembering John told him he had to work. It was late in the afternoon, and he had sleep for maybe seven or eight hours, which was probably a personal best since getting to Atlantis. He was hungry, but since he wasn’t sure when his dinner date would be, he decided a shower would be best.

Rodney tried to tell himself that he wasn’t nervous about the prospect of the date. So far, he and John seemed to click well once they started touching, but he wasn’t sure how a date would go, and he feared it would turn awkward. He was getting dressed when his door opened and John got in, carrying a large tray.

“I wasn’t sure if you would be up just yet. I brought you breakfast in bed, or rather, dinner,” John said, lifting the tray to mark his words.

Rodney stopped the motion of putting his jacket, unsure as to what to say. “Isn’t it a bit early for dinner?”

John shrugged. “You skipped lunch, I figured you would be hungry. Where do you want me?”

‘ _On your knees,_ ’ Rodney thought, then shook his head. The sexual frustration was getting to him. “You can set things by the table.”

Rodney briefly considered putting on socks and shoes, then discarded the idea. They both knew where this was going, and he didn’t want to lose time taking them off later. Instead, he watched as John dragged his worktable to the middle of the room and placed several plates around it. It was far from ideal, too small for two people to sit comfortably across each other, but it was intimate.

“I brought beer,” John said, placing the six-pack on the table.

Rodney raised an eyebrow. “Beer? For a date?”

“What’s wrong with beer? You like beer.”

Rodney rolled his eyes. “You realize this is part of the reason I didn’t want to believe we were apparently dating, don’t you? Beer is just fine for doing things with a friend, but it’s not a date drink.”

“Of course you can drink beer in dates!”

“No, beer is what guys drink when they want to do things together and not make things gay. So, just the opposite of the intention of a date.”

John raised an eyebrow. “What? What kind of twisted logic is that? Who told you that? Because I can’t believe you came up with it.”

Rodney thought back about his days in college, when his roommate found out that he was bi and that led to a night of watching porn and drinking beer, that ended with a blow job and the guy arguing he was still straight since he was in the receiving end. “I may actually have been misled about the beer, come to think of it, maybe the guy who told me wasn’t the most trustworthy. Not that I particularly mind, it was a fun night either way, and I wasn’t the one who needed an excuse to pretend I was straight.” And seeing John’s confused expression, he continued, “Never mind, I can tell you about this another time. Now, I’m really hungry, and I have red wine. A _proper_ dinner drink.”

“Red wine looks great.”

Rodney took a bottle from his secret stash. It was his only wine bottle, and he was saving it for a special occasion, but he guessed that a chance to have a proper date with John was the most special thing he was going to get in the foreseeable future.

There was nothing special about the food, but Rodney appreciated the fact that John brought his favorites. Until this point, he never realized how much attention John paid to him, but thinking about it now, it was obvious. At first, they ate in silence. Neither knew what to say under these circumstances, although they had ate together in one of their rooms many times before, often even lying in bed together and sharing a computer to watch a movie. There was something in the air that made Rodney almost want to skip dinner and jump John, but he hadn’t been lying, he was hungry.

“So, about that machine you were working on last night. What was it supposed to do?” John asked, trying to break the ice.

Rodney shrugged. “Cellular replication of some kind. Carson wants me to see if I can fix it, as if I don’t have enough to do already. If I can find the time to calibrate it properly, I think it can be used to replace any damaged tissue, but not only that, the replacement can be made to have any shape or functionality instead of simply reproducing missing tissue. Do you have any idea the impact this would have if it ever got declassified? If I end up winning my first Nobel in Medicine instead of Physics my peers will never let me live this down.”

John laughed, the Nobel obsession was typical McKay. “Yes, what a disaster would it be to win a Nobel Prize while revolutionizing modern medicine.”

Rodney narrowed his eyes. “I don’t think you understand how serious this is, medicine isn’t even a real science. But I have to admit this is an interesting finding. Although I wish we had found it a little sooner, it seems like fixing it will be easier than reprogramming the ascension machine.” Then he bit his lip, silently hoping that John wouldn’t ask about what he accidentally let slip. If he believed psychology to be an actual science, he would visit Dr. Heightmeyer to ask her about this tendency of his to speak things he didn’t mean when John is around.

“I thought the ascension machine was reprogrammed using just a sample of your DNA.”

Rodney sighed. “To save my life, yes. But that’s not what I was referring to. Using my DNA as it was ended up causing an uncomfortable side effect. It took me, Radek and Carson nearly two weeks to come up with a way to use it to reverse what it did, otherwise I would have had to go the long painful route again.”

It took John a moment. “Oh, I didn’t know you had any lasting effects because of that.”

Rodney rolled his eyes. “How eager would you be to tell people if you lost your penis to an ancient device?”

John nodded. “Point taken. You know, I understand why you normally wouldn’t want to talk about this, but considering I’m about half an hour away from getting in your pants, if there’s anything I should know, this would be a good time to talk about it.”

“Half an hour? Someone is feeling confident,” Rodney said, just to tease him. “And this is ancient technology combined with my programming skills that we are talking about, if I haven’t told you, you wouldn’t know the difference. I don’t have a prostate, but that’s about it. Although that doesn’t stop me from liking to take a cock up my ass, so I hope you like both roles. I didn’t exactly had a chance to test things with anyone other than myself, since that happened, but everything seems to work just fine. And that’s about as much as willing to talk about this. Anything else you may want to know, I’m only willing to show you with a practical demonstration.”

John looked at him in a strange, focused look, and Rodney feared for a moment he would run away, that Rodney had said too much. “You are not going to freak out because of this, are you?”

That seemed to snap John out of it. “What? No, of course not. Unless you have a huge pointy piecing on your head, you are probably not going to get me to freak out. Don’t even ask, unless you want to feel awkward about another Wraith,” he added when he saw Rodney’s confused expression. Then, he blushed, and averted his eyes. “I was actually thinking it’s pretty hot that no one else got to test your new _equipment_.” He licked his lips, unconsciously. “And that really makes me want to suck your cock.”

It was Rodney’s time to blush, his brain assaulted with images of John on his knees, and Rodney grabbing him by hair, making it even more unraveled. He always thought that John’s hair was just begging to be grabbed as someone fucked his mouth, and that someone may just as well be Rodney. He cleared his throat. “I hope you are not just teasing me.”

John leaned against the table, getting close enough that Rodney could feel his breath. “If you want to forget the rest of dinner and get on the bed, I can show you how serious I am. But in exchange I want to make out until you reach your refractory period, because I haven’t forgot your promise.”

Rodney figured he wasn’t all that hungry anymore. “I can do that,” he said while getting up from his chair, so fast he almost dropped it to the floor.

John would have laughed, if it wasn’t for the fact he was just as eager. He nearly tripped while trying to take off his shoes to climb in bed with Rodney. He was about to kiss him when a thought occurred to him. “You told _Zelenka_?”

Rodney seemed taken back by this. “What are you…? Oh, I had to, he’s the only other competent scientist here, and things would go faster with his help. Don’t tell him I told you that.”

“I could have helped too, I’m good with ancient tech.”

Rodney rolled his eyes. “You are good turning things on, and I couldn’t tell you about this, this is not the kind of help you ask of someone you have a crush on. Now, don’t you have better things to do with your mouth than unnecessary talking?”

John was more than happy to oblige, kissing Rodney while lifting his shirt, then kissing his way down his body while he worked on opening his pants. As much as he wanted a slow and long first time, he knew both of them needed to take the edge off.

He had just freed Rodney’s erection when Rodney placed a hand on his shoulder, indicating that he should stop. John looked up, and Rodney had a frown. He was about to ask what was wrong when he noticed he had a finger on his radio.

“Are you sure I’m the only one that can do this?” A pause. “Fine, I’ll be there in five, don’t let any of the idiots touch anything until I get there.” He looked at John, disappointed. “Someone activated a bomb, we have fifteen minutes before it destroys the city and half the planet.” He looked at John for a moment, between his legs and still very close to his cock. “Although I’m sure I can finish in less time than that if we hurry.” He didn’t mean unarming the bomb.

John sighed, and carefully pulled Rodney’s underwear up. “I would rather you unarmed it first, then came back here for at least a couple hours of sex, maybe more, since escaping these situations is so sexy. Do you need me to come with?”

“No, they would have called you too if it was necessary, and I’ll concentrate better if you stay away.”

“Ouch, you’ll hurt my feelings. Any chance that after this you can take off your radio for a while?”

Rodney nodded, and got off the bed. “Wait here, in fifteen minutes I’ll be either dead or running back to you, and I think you know that a genius such as myself wouldn’t allow us to die over something as ordinary as a bomb,” he said, while putting on his shoes.

John laughed. “As long as you don’t decide to stay in the lab until morning, I will.”

Rodney hesitated, then gave John a quick kiss before leaving. He wasn’t even worried about the bomb, confident that he could stop it with ease, or else he wouldn’t have asked that John remained in the room. Mostly, he was just formulating a hypothesis that the universe was conspiring against any and all chances he had of getting laid.

John had to wait about ten minutes before getting a call on his radio. “Coronel Sheppard,” Rodney’s voice called, “the situation was resolved, and there will be no need for your intervention. Unless you want to come here and shoot these incompetent pseudoscientists that were assigned to me.”

John smiled involuntarily, and palmed himself through his pants, wanting to recover his erection before Rodney got there. “That’s great, McKay. But I’m not going to shoot anyone, that’s frowned upon in most societies.”

“Then maybe lend me your gun? I could shoot them.”

“McKay, you couldn’t hit them even if they were standing right in front of you.”

“I have better things to do with my time than spending twelve hours a day in the shooting range, unlike _certain_ people.”

“You know what? You are way too stressed. No more coffee for you. And why don’t you take the rest of the night off? Give your scientists a break.”

“Fuck you, Sheppard. McKay out,” Rodney said, just as he got through his door.

John tossed his radio on the nightstand. “I’m counting on it, actually.”

Rodney tossed his radio on the general direction of the nightstand, nearly running to the bed, and stepping out of his shoes. “I told Zelenka I would shut down my radio, and that if a disaster occurred, he could deal with it himself.”

John pulled Rodney to the bed. “So no more interruptions?”

“I hope not. Maybe you could ask the city really nicely to close communications to this room unless there’s a red alert?”

“I like the way you think.” John concentrated for a moment, and Rodney tried not to think about the fact that John’s abilities were as sexy as they were irritating. “Done. Now, where were we?”

And mercifully, this time, they weren’t interrupted.

**Author's Note:**

> Spoilery content warning: John mocks Rodney over the name "Meredith", Rodney accidentally comes out as ftm, they eventually talk about it and it's a somewhat awkward talk, but John admits he was a jerk and doesn't misgender him again after learning this, John was also planing "dates" with Rodney without calling him that, and learning that makes Rodney temporarily doubt reality, but they quickly work things out. Oh, and John talks about liking to wear panties, briefly, and about breaking up with a boyfriend that kept insisting in fisting.


End file.
